Kairi's Second Day Off
by Incubus Zenith
Summary: DONT READ UNTILL YOU HAVE READ THE FIRST PART! Kairi tryed once before to have the day to herself but this time it might work out! Sora's mad at a tree and Riku is a pervert! like most things I have read or seen. REVIEW PLEASE!SoraXRiku action
1. Chapter 1: Almost caught

Kairi's second day off

(WARNING: This part of the story will be flaming Sora a lot, I love Sora I just like making funny stories. I have nothing against Sora. Oh and I don't own Kingdom hearts or the characters)

Chapter 1: Almost caught

Kairi walked along the Beach of Destiny Island, her feet were in the water. "Ok today I won't have any interruptions! Sora is with Riku, so today should be pretty quite…I wonder what there doing? Oh well, why should I care? I got the day to myself I got the day to myself!" Kairi said happily and sat in the sand.

Kairi watched the ocean waves and let out a happy sigh.

Kairi took out a ball and threw it high in the air. The ball soared and hit the water Kairi got up off the sand and dusted her pink and white skirt off.

She walked into the water picking up the ball. When she turned around she saw Sora staring at a tree, far off in the distance.

"Oh man he better not see my beautiful face!" Kairi exclaimed and dashed down the island as fast as a car. She whooshed open the door to the sea side shack and ran inside.

Sora banged the tree with his fist. "COOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMEEEEEEEE ONNNNNN" He wined and banged it harder.

He turned around and plopped himself on the hard ground crossing his arms and legs.

"Stupid tree can't give me a coconut!" Sora said in anger. Sora sat on the ground stubbornly.

"Stupid tree thinks its so cool and what not! I'll show it!" Sora said to himself.

"OW! I HAD AN IDEA!"

He screamed! He got up and ran around in circles holding his head.

"IDEA, IDEA, IDEA!" He screamed.


	2. Chapter 2: Return of the Almighty Riku

Authors note: Hey there people! Wanna know what I love getting on stories. REVIEWS! Please is you read it can you review, even if it's just a "love it" or "it was funny" or "good job" or something like that I would love it :D! ENJOY!

PS: REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW!!!!

PPS: Mild SoraXRiku action in this chapter

Chapter 2: Return of the Almighty Riku

Sora rolled on the ground holding his head tight.

Hard footsteps started to sound behind Sora. He got up and the steps got louder. Sora panicked and dashed down the island.

It turns out Riku was behind him all along.

Kairi peeked out of the seaside shack.

"Aw why did he run, stupid Kairi isn't here so I thought it would be the perfect chance! God I want her dead!" Riku complained. Kairi had a disgusted look on her face.

"I knew it! Riku does want me to be gone! Well I guess that explains all the times he

'Accidentally' pushed me off the top of a tree. And 'accidentally' sat on me in the water. Wow I missed out on a lot!" Kairi said to herself scratching her head.

She watched Riku fallow after the running Sora.

Kairi slowly walked out of the seaside shack and went to the other side of the island. She sat by the water. She took off her shoes and socks and put her feet in the water. "Hmm come to think about it…"

Flash back:

Riku and Kairi were walking down the beach.

"Hey Kairi what's that over there?" Kairi looked and Riku took out his Keyblade and smacked Kairi in the back of the head.

"OW!!! WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT!" Kairi cursed.

"Oh a coconut came flying out of nowhere and hit you" Riku lied.

"Well where's the coconut?" Kairi asked.

Riku stood there for a second. "It…it BOUNCED! Yea it was such a hard hit it bounced right off and flew away!" Riku lied again.

Kairi gave him a weird look. "Ok…" She said walking the opposite direction.

Another Flash back:

Sora, Riku, and Kairi were sitting on the Papou tree.

Kairi was on the side closest to the water and Riku sat beside her fallowing Sora beside Riku at the other end of the tree.

Riku slowly put his arm around Sora. Sora sat there staring into space not noticing.

Kairi was also staring into space her legs were swaging back and forth. One of her arms was around the end of the tree and the other one was beside her holding herself up.

Riku raised his hand and evil look on his face. He gave Kairi a hard push and she plunged into the water. Riku grabbed a rock and dropped it on her.

Kairi rushed up so fast the rock flew off and plunged into the water behind her. "WHAT THE FUCK!" Kairi cursed.

"Opps." Riku said putting a finger to his lip. Sora turned his head and saw Kairi in the water. "Kairi what happened? Did you fall?" Sora asked holding in laughter.

"What does it look like you dumb yaoi boy!" She said waving her fist. Sora shrugged and hugged Riku. Riku kissed Sora on the head and then looked at Kairi sticking his tongue out when her head was turned.

He also mad rude funny faces at her while her head was turned.

Kairi got up from the water and walked to shore.

'Sora is mine' Riku thought happily.

Sora had fallen asleep in the last 2 minutes.

End of Flash back:

"Wow I missed out on a lot. All this time Riku has tried to kill me. But I always survive, but how?" She asked herself. "Oh well they don't think I'm here so I should have a nice pain free day!" She said to herself.

Sora stopped by a tree panting. Riku had caught up.

He placed his hand on Sora's shoulder and turned him around. Sora made a little girl scream then covered him mouth fast noticing it was Riku.

Riku put his hand on Sora's shoulder. "You ok dude?" Riku asked.

Sora's eyes were wide. "Um…I think…" Sora said hesitating.

Riku smiled. Sora looked around like he had did something wrong. "Sora you're so cute when you're stupid." Riku said smiling more.

"Was that a compliment or an insult?" Sora asked.

"Both" Riku said giving him a weird look now. 'Wow he is stupid' Riku thought.

Sora stood there thinking for a second. "I don't get it." Sora said scratching his head.

Riku slapped his forehead.

"That must have hurt!" Sora said doing it to himself. "Ow it does!"

'And I use to wonder why he is so stupid' Riku thought with a sigh. Riku patted Sora's head making his spiky hair go down on every pat. "Hey Sora um Kairi's not here, its just me and you" Riku said trying to give a hint.

"Yea I know I have been looking for Kairi but I can't find her, I wanted to gibe her a coconut for no reason but the tree was being stupid!" Sora said angrily.

Riku slapped his forehead again and Sora imitated. "Riku that hurts why are you doing it?" Sora asked. "OH MY GOD!" Riku started to get pissed and walked away. Sora ran after him and jumped on his back, forcing him to the ground. Sora had his arms around his body. "NO I DON'T WANT TO BE ALONE!" Sora cried. Riku smiled. 'I like this position' He thought with a little laugh after.

"Uh Sora?" Riku said but couldn't help but laugh and smile harder. "What?" Sora answered with a question. Riku flipped the over so Riku was on top of Sora "Like I said Kairi isn't here." Riku's smile got big. "Yes, and your point is?" Sora asked. Riku sighed and kissed Sora. "That dumbass!" Riku said his smiling turning into an angry look.

"OHHHHHHH! I Get it now!" Sora smiled.

Kairi peeked out from behind the seaside shack and saw Riku ontop of Sora. "Oh yea Yaoi moment! I think I'll take out my camera!" Kairi pulled a camera out of her pocket and some strawberry pocky and stuck one in her mouth. She got her camera ready by zooming in and getting ready to take the picture. Her finger was one the button and was twitching with excitement.

Riku started to kiss Sora and Kairi started to giggle and started to take pictures.

Sora pulled away for second. "I have a feeling some crazy fan girl is watching and taking pictures of us and eating strawberry pocky." Sora said and gave Riku a little push and his upper body was higher up.

Kairi hid behind the wall and kept peeking out to see if Sora had stopped looking.

"Sora thats way to specific, I highly doubt is true" Riku said and pushed Sora back down.

"You sure?" Sora asked. Riku smiled "Positive! I am the almighty Riku after all!" Riku said and kissed Sora again. Sora shrugged.


	3. Chapter 3: The Fight

Hey hey peoples! Hope you like my story so far! I had big writers block for this chapter but I finally came up with something. Its kinda random but I'm a random person. I'm trying to make it long so you have lots to read. I'm trying to reach 3 pages without indents. But I might not make it that far I usually only make it to about 2 pages.

Warning: Character bashing, yaoi moments, swearing, and violence.

Enjoy!

Sora

Chapter 3: The Fight

Kairi had a big smile on her face. She giggled so hard she took a picture of her shoes. Sora was nervous and uncomfortable. He had a very bad feeling they were being watched but Riku didn't believe him. Sora got up again pushing Riku off. "What's wrong Sora do you think were being watched?" He asked trying to pull Sora back on him. "Yea…" Sora said nervously trying to stay up because Riku was pulling hard. "Riku I don't really want to anymore I just have a bad feeling." Sora said trying to get up. Riku pulled him down and made him go back on the ground. "Come on Sora we finally have a day without Kairi! Lets enjoy it!" Riku said going to kiss Sora. "Riku!" Sora yelled and moved him off. Kairi sighed. "Come on Yaoi is hawt! Do it do it!" Kairi said to herself. Sora got up and dusted off. "Riku your stupid!" He said. "Yea I'm the stupid one…" Riku whispered to himself. "What did you say Riku?" Sora asked and turned his head. "Oh nothing nothing!" Riku said and got up. Sora rolled his eyes and started to walk away. Riku walked fast to him and hugged him from behind. "Riku go away!" Sora said trying to get out of the hug. "Sora you're no fun!" Riku said letting go. Sora turned around with and angry deadly look. "NO FUN! I AM A LOT OF FUN!" Sora yelled. Sora kicked a tree and a coconut came down. He threw it at Riku's head. "Hey what that fuck was that for!" Riku yelled. "BECAUSE YOUR MEAN I AM FUN I AM I AM I AM I AM I AM!" Sora shouted back. Kairi put her camera away and walked farther down the island. "Wow that was bad." She said to herself. "Wait this is a good thing if Riku is mad at Sora I'll have more time with him SCORE!" She said and started to dance randomly. "But that means no more Yaoi moments but that also means I get Sora!" She talked to herself for another minute or so and then heard a "FINE!" It sounded like Sora and then Riku yelled. "FINE!" Then she heard a clunk and a big "OWWWWWW." But she couldn't tell who it was. "RIGHT NOW I WOULD RATHER HAVE SEX WITH KAIRI WHITCH IS A SURPRISE FOR ME TO SAY SINCE I HATE HER!" Riku yelled. "WELL WHY WOULD SHE FUCK YOU WHEN SHE CAN HAVE ALL OF THIS!" Sora moved his hands down his body as he yelled back at Riku. Riku took off his shirt. "WELL I GOT MUCELS AND YOU GOT CHICKEN LEGS! THAT'S RIGHT!" Riku snapped his fingers. Kairi peeked around the corner and saw them fighting. Riku was shirtless and Sora had his hands on his hips. "I DO NOT HAVE CHICKEN LEGS!" Sora growled and jumped on Riku pulling his long hair. "HEY THAT'S A GIRLY MOVE!" Riku yelled and threw Sora off of him. Kairi stared but for some reason was smiling. "Why you little bastard!" Sora said and got up. He jumped on Riku's legs and made him fall to the ground. Sora bit his legs and Riku screamed. "You little cannibal!" Riku yelled and started kicking his legs. "Wow all this just because Riku said Sora isn't fun." Kairi said and laughed. "Maybe I can just watch for a little longer, then if it gets to bad I might break it up." She said evilly. Sora grabbed Riku's bare shoulders and dug his nails into them. Riku screamed and grabbed Sora and flipped him over slamming him on his back. Kairi cringed when Riku threw Sora. "Ouch! Maybe I should break it up soon…but what would happen if I broke it up?" Kairi thought for a moment.

(Kairi's thought)

"Hey Sora, Kairi's trying to break up our fight lets hit her with our Keyblades until she's dead!" Riku said smiling. "Yes lets!" Sora said smiling as well. "Oh shit…" Kairi swore.

(End of Kairi's thought)

"No that would never happen…would it?" Kairi said starting to be worried. "Well maybe Riku but Sora is my friend. Or maybe he's working with Riku to destroy me! Yea that's it!" Kairi laughed weirdly and her eye twitched. "Heh heh heh!" She laughed. "No if they were I would be dead by now. I'll just go break it up." Kairi said shrugging. Kairi walked up to the two and punched them in the faces. "Shut up before I kick your ass." Kairi said and walked off. "Well that was weird." Sora said as Kairi walked off. "Yea…what ever wanna have sex?" Riku said forgetting the fight. "SURE!" Sora screamed.


End file.
